For which we are wholly and solely responsible by different ways and means. as we know that there is no doubt that, we make our marriage very costly and dangerous with full of devilish customs like Thap, Lakit nishen, Biedh nisheen, Boudh doah, Malla miaz Mehdi raat, Baraat phir saal, kokar Liejh , badam liphap, iftiyaar majma, Geven woel, job, caste system, house etc not a single one has anything with Islam, rather to find simple and well character home as well as boy/girl
BY: JAVAID JAFRI
“Marriage is my Sunnah and whosoever turns away from sunnah is not of me.” Noble Prophet Mohammad (Pbuh)
Creator has bestowed the world with unlimited treasures, and marriage is one among the best treasure, which turns unknown souls into strong, affectionate and loveable relationship. Marriage is a great blessing which every human being must enjoy and practice through legally. The idea of marriage is something that we have planted in our brains since we were kids, without shadow of doubt marriage is the reason this piece is in front of you and you are able to read the same right now and it is impossible to ignore the topic. Because I feel that marriage is something that really needs to be re-defined in today’s modern era.
Prophet Mohammad (s.a.w.w) says Marriage is my sunnah and whosoever turns away from sunnah is not of me. Indeed Man has freedom of will through which he can choose whichever woman he wishes to marry and without this one’s life is totally incomplete. “Marriages are made in heaven” is an extremely famous quote but I could never agree with it. The nikkah ceremony is indeed an important occasion in our social life, when couple starts a legal contract/agreement and decide to begin a new life together. This beautiful union ushers in a new era of happiness, bliss and mutual relationship, it is the starting of taking on new responsibilities and building new relationships which leads this contemporary world with population and by this way world will pass on until the Day of Judgment.
The thing which really matters at the end of life is contentment, satisfaction and peace, whom do we want to impress by showing expensive house car, and extravagant wedding.
Generally we all have heard many times that we should get married before it’s too late, There are different definitions of different people for late marriage in this world ; For some late marriage means if you have crossed the age of 25 then you are late, and if you have crossed 30 then you are late. It is not if you are late then you are doing a crime, but keeping in view the present scenario and circumstance of society it is obligatory to get married at (proper time) early age to save ourselves from different devilish activities. As per experts marriage should be solemnised at proper time, otherwise that could be the reason which leads us to the illegal and useless activities and results in destroying ourselves and during this important period the age is the age of development for young and blooming children but unfortunately some may get indulged in an illegal relationship with opposite sex by physical appearance and emotions which surely diverts the important studies and present task and ultimately fails to achieve the target as well as goal and ruins once precious future and life.
MARRIAGE INCREASES OUR WEALTH!
One of the ways to increase our sustenance (rizq) is through marriage. It will surprise to many brothers and sisters which are reading this piece.Perhaps this is because of the fact that one’s poor financial situation in our times is the main reason that prevents a person from marriage. And the, the irony of the fact is that marriage is one of the easiest way in which a Muslim can guarantee an increase in rizq (or sustenance or wealth) from Allah s.w.t. But unfortunately the mentality of society has been changed completely and damaged.Allah said in Quran: “And marry those among you who are single (male and female). If they be poor, Allah will enrich them out his bounty,” [surah Nur,24,32]. This verse is a strong encouragement to get married and not to worry about becoming poor because Allah will help increase their sustenance and wealth.
Mostly boys and girls are really willing to get married on proper time, In fact some parents are willing as well but the present custom is working as a kind of barrier for them, and by this way they fail to respond the important marriage proposals of their life. It is unquestionable that our present and day by day increasing fictitious customs of our society have ruined many lives so far of a common and middle class people of our society, In Srinagar city alone around ten thousands of girls have crossed marriageable age (A survey conducted by a kashmir based trust) . For which we are wholly and solely responsible by different ways and means. as we know that there is no doubt that, we make our marriage very costly and dangerous with full of devilish customs like Thap, Lakit nishen, Biedh nisheen, Boudh doah, Malla miaz Mehdi raat, Baraat phir saal, kokar Liejh , badam liphap, iftiyaar majma, Geven woel, job, caste system, house etc not a single one has anything with Islam, rather to find simple and well character home as well as boy/girl “ The most blessed nikah is the one with the least expenses.”(Prophet Mohammad, saww)
It has becomes a trend which others have to follow helplessly and unwillingly , It increases burden on the poor families who find it difficult to get their daughters married and by this way turns themselves into huge slums, which becomes a devastating problem for their children and offsprings in future. The thing which really matters at the end of life is contentment, satisfaction and peace, whom do we want to impress by showing expensive house car, and extravagant wedding. “Do not be niggardly, nor extravagant that you may later feel reprehensive and constrained” (Al- Isra,29)
GIRLS MUST BE MARRIED AT RIGHT TIME!
The noble prophet Mohammad (s.a.w.w) has said “virgin girls are like fruits on trees. If not plucked in time, the sun will rot them and the wind will disperse them. When girls reach maturity and their sexual instincts arise, like that of women, their only remedy is marriage. If they aren’t married, they are prone to moral corruption. It is because they are human beings and human beings are prone to making mistakes” There is a very subtle message in this saying of the prophet Mohammad (s.a.w.w) Just as there is proper timing for plucking fruits, there is a proper age for marriage, for every girl. A girl who can’t understand and shoulder the responsibility of married life is like a raw fruit that needs to remain on the tree (I,e. her father’s home) until it ripens and sweetens. On the other hand if a girl loses the freshness of youth while yet unmarried, then she is like an over ripe fruit that would further wither away, as the time passes.
Illusively during adolescence period mostly some innocent boys and girls lose their track and accidently with each other and create an impression on seeing ones physique, beauty, car, dress etc, and build a long/short illegal and baseless relationship and fulfill all materialistic desire and wishes and make plans for spending their entire life together, despite of being well aware about vices of each other. Doubtlessly here is the initiation of destruction for both which completely ruins their important future. So this is the time were we as a parent and advertent must carefully educate our grown-ups about values of sex. If we fail, the society will teach them the wrong values. We must always keep vigil on them to save their precious future.
Another issue nowadays is that the trend has shifted, some parents are compromising with their asinine girls which are more excited to explore themselves such as getting well paid job, travelling lonely outside with their male friends, fulfilling their personal materialistic desires and ensure a capable life with couple of male friends which is temporarily, rather give priority to the legal relationship and this becomes the cause of rampage of society.